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Monday, December 31, 2007

Just an update

Went to the weighed in...since last weigh in I have lost 5 pounds. Since I gained a pound at my last weigh in that brings my total loss to: (drumroll please) 28 pounds!!! so according to my doctor's scales that's 236.5. Thanks for keeping me honest!!!

Saturday, December 29, 2007

It's official! I'm kid friendly...but this is MESSED UP!!! But in a funny way of course!

So Angelika had posted that she was rated NC-17, but not for the usual I thought I'd try it a few times...and keep editing the same post just to see what would happened...enjoy the following:

I went and rated myself and this is what I got:

I wonder what would happen if I used the words: sex or hurt or pain even innocently as in, "My child fell down the other day and skinned his knee. He said that it really hurt and he was in a lot of pain. So being the loving mother that I am I took him to the doctor to be checked out. Once there, they gave me a form to fill out. I did and took it back to the window. The nurse looked over the paperwork and informed me that I forgot to check the box for my child's sex. I corrected the problem and we went in to see the doctor. The good news is that my child is fine."

checking website
Well, I'm still:

but with a warning about the use of the word pain x2. I wonder how many times I'd have to use it to make a PG? Let's find out

checking website
by just using the word again when informing you of what happened
I have NOW a

This rating was determined based on the presence of the following words:

pain (3x) hurt (2x)

checking website
I'm still:

BUT This rating was determined based on the presence of the following words:

pain (4x) hurt (3x) sex (2x)

OK one more let's go...

checking website
I'm still

This rating was determined based on the presence of the following words:

pain (5x) hurt (4x) sex (3x)

That's pretty messed up!!! Funny...but MESSED UP nonetheless. Hey! At least I'm social,"...sad and demented, but social."

Thursday, December 27, 2007

Different types of Autism

NOTE: While my blog is primarily about my life, I periodically will throw in articles related to Autism as one of my children is on the spectrum with Asperger's Syndrome:

The different types of Autism. This will better help you distinguish the difference so you can choose the right method of treatments. Here are three common types....

Classical Autism
These signs and symptoms that appear differently in each child, and parents should fully remember that what is considered in one Autistic child may not appear in another child with autism. This is part of the time-consuming nature of the diagnosis of autism. Without a definative lab test such as bloodwork, diagnosis is a process of defining and understanding the symptoms as displayed. as a rule, children with autism exhibit the following signs and symptoms to a great degree :
- expressive & receptive communication and social deflicts
-insistance on routine & resistance to change
-appearing to be "off in their own little world"
-resistance to physical closeness such as hugging
-attachment to "odd" toys such as kitchen utensils
-parallel play (playing beside other children rather than interactively with them) & lack of imaginative play
-sudden and apparently unexplainable anger & tantrums
-repetative behaviors & obsessive-compulsive disorder
-splinter skills ( excelling in a particular skill that is ABOVE the apparent IQ level )
-appearing to have sensory overload in normal enviorments

Asperger's syndrome
-essentially normal speech development with phrases used by age 3
-essentially normal cognitive development
-essentially normal development in self-help & curiosity about the world
-gross motor skills are often delayed & clumsiness is common
-eye contact, facial expression, body launguage inappropriate to the social situation
-difficulty expressing emotions to others
-repetative mannerisms such as " flapping "
-insistance on routine

High functioning Autism
This disorder is often confused with Asperger's syndrome. It is , however, a distinct disorder. There is controversy due to it being so similar to Classical Autism, it may be difficult to determine the difference. The next following statements are important ....In 2004 it was thought 75% of children with Autism were mentally retarded. (Remember this was data from 2004). The technical standard for determining high-functioning autism and classical autism is the presence of mental retardation. In the past, a child with autism who was retarded was considered to have classical autism, and without mental retardation...the high-functioning autism was diagnosed. If your child has a diagnosis of Autism, do not assume he/she is mentally retarded, this may be the furthest thing from the truth.This is a gray area that is extremely difficult to determine for children on the spectrum. Due to the fact is almost impossible to determine an individuals IQ whom is non-verbal.

SOURCE: "Everything parents guide to children with Autism"
by Adelle Jameson Tilton (Author)

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

I'm back, but not blogging regularly as of yet.

Wedding was fantastic!! Christmas was Even Better!! Now I'm back at work. Oh well...things are going well. Had a Doctor's appointment today and signed up for Basically, you get paid to surf, and I believe you are paid for every $10 and they pay you through Paypal.

Anyway, I'll be in and out for the next week and will get back to blogging regularly (hopefully) after January 1st.

Hugs to All!!!

Monday, December 17, 2007

I apologize for not being around!

It's been a crazy few days. First, I went to get my dress fitted for my sister's wedding and it was still too big. Long story short they had to re-alter it in an hour and they didn't charge me because they never wrote down my new measurements 2 weeks ago. Second, we had a drastic change in weather down here and that wrecked havoc on my sinuses so I've been trying to get well quickly as I cannot afford to be sick this week AT ALL...and finally, my weigh in for the day: I gained 1 pound, but my BMI dropped and my % of body fat dropped so they think it's a muscle gain. Oh well, my clothes are still getting to be too big so I guess that's all that matters right? So the total now is 23 lbs. Just continue to keep me honest OK?

Wednesday, December 12, 2007


Just thought I'd take a moment to explain Entrecard to those of you who may not be using it (or know about it for that matter.)

On Sunday my friends over at Gorilla Sushi posted a very informative post on this way of advertising your site. It has increased the hits on my page and it's free!

Entrecard is, as it's site states," easy way to network with other blog owners; Get to know your dedicated readers and favorite writers. Let Entrecard introduce you." Give it a try, then drop me a card!

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Let's help them out!

I am writing today because I want to ask for your help. My aunt is a 4th grade teacher and she works for the city meaning that a lot of her work goes un-noticed and unappreciated. She is trying to raise money for a project for her kids. She is only asking for $614. It’s not much. Please read her page about it here and should you feel moved to do so, please donate. Let’s show these kids the power of the internet! Thank you!!

Just a quick note

Went to the doctor today...even with all the cake and cookies and stuff from the birthday festivities this past week I’m down another pound!

You all are helping to keep me honest!

Monday, December 10, 2007


Can't write much at the moment, but here's the craziness of the day:

Took my son for his yearly check-up. He freaked out! about the blood pressure cuff, but was overall ok. He's doing great and growing well, and calmed down very quickly after his freaking out stage. Ahh...he's getting much better at controlling himself. All in all he had a fabulous birthday party this past weekend...lots of kids came and they and their parents all had a blast...if you've never been to a Pump It Up I'd suggest going to one in your area at least once as they are a ton of fun! Here's the best part though...on the day of his actual birthday, I took the day off from work to spend with him at school and help out with his class...and he told me that THAT was the best thing about his birthday...he said it made him feel really special! (I think I'm going to cry!)

The announcement was made at work today...and I survived again. Still waiting to see how much OT this may cause in the future. The mood around here is a little somber to say the least. The person who was cut it taking it as well as can be expected, but we're all still pretty bummed.

Well, I guess I better get back to it...That's it for now!

Friday, December 7, 2007

My very 1st award!!!

My dear cousin Leigh gave me my very first award ever! As I am new to this blogging and awards thing I think I will have to think of who else to give this to, but to start off I will award this to the following:

My Brother
Grape Scott

I'm soooo pleased with myself :-)

Thursday, December 6, 2007

It's the most wonderful time of the year

Below is a copy of a post my brother has on his blog...I thought he said it so well himself that I had to share it as he wrote it. So without further ado here it is my brother's post on "It's the most wonderful time of the year"

Is the schmaltz just a little too much?

You know, I am a born cynic, somewhat sarcastic, and a bit of a grouch at times, so you would think I would not get into Christmas. You would think that I would be totally against the glitz, the holly, the "sleigh rides"... oh wait I live in Florida... no sleigh rides... but you would think the sight of fat guys in red suits with white beards and patent-leather boots would cause me to hurl. And because I'm a Christian I would have the excuse that the holiday is way too commercial, and we have forgotten the "Reason for the Season".

But the fact is, I'm not like that at all. I love Christmas, I love the cheesy music, the schmaltzy TV movies, the huge huge Christmas sales, the lights, the decorations, you name it... I'm all over it. Ask my wife it is quite true.

I'll admit it can be a bit overwhelming, and the season is undoubtedly stressful, but maybe the corny, over-the-top stuff is just what we need. Here's what I mean. We... and by that I mean adults... give this holiday to the kids. We think that all the parades, flash and pizzazz of Christmas is just a winter diversion for them, but what if we embraced it too? What if we let ourselves be children about the holiday? I'm not alone in my cynical, sarcastic attitude toward life... that's our culture. To be honest, it's negative, and that's not really godly. So, what would it be if we put aside our attitudes, our anticipation of the stress, and just enjoyed this time for what it is?

Jesus said, if you don't enter the kingdom of God like a little child you can't enter it. I think we can see that children don't have a problem enjoying the "commercial" aspects of Christmas and the understanding that Christmas is about Christ. They get excited about the Charlie Brown Christmas Special (as do I) and the Nativity reenactment because they get that it is all a giant celebration.

Do some people miss place their joy onto the gifts and the stuff more than they should? Sure. But that doesn't mean we have to.

So, here's my advice... be a kid for a change. As the song says, "to kids from 1 to 92" Embrace the schmaltz, take sometime to listen to cheesy Christmas music, drink pepperminty drinks with lots of chocolate... see what happens.

PS: If you like his thoughts you can read more on his blog at

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Report: Fever Improves Autism Symptoms

This is an interesting article that I thought I'd share with those interested. I read this article a friend sent me:

And then a different friend to whom I forwarded the article to sent this from Web MD

Report: Fever Improves Autism Symptoms
Reason for Improvement Not Understood
By Salynn Boyles
WebMD Medical News
Reviewed by Louise Chang, MD

Dec. 3, 2007 -- Children with autism appear to improve when they have a fever, according to intriguing new research that could lead to a better understanding of the disorder.

Fever was associated with less hyperactivity, improved communication, and less irritability in the study involving children with autism and related disorders.

Anecdotal reports of improvements in autism symptoms related to fever have circulated for years, but the research represents the first scientific investigation into the observed association.

While kids with autism might be expected to be calmer and less hyperactive when they have fevers, the improvement in communication and socialization seen in the study suggests that fever directly affects brain function, pediatric neurologist Andrew Zimmerman, MD, of Baltimore's Kennedy Krieger Institute, tells WebMD.

"The improvement in symptoms may mean the underlying wiring of the brain (of an autistic child) develops more normally than we have thought," he says, adding that the problem may lie with the connections within the brain responsible for sending information.

"Somehow fever appears to be changing the ability to make these connections," he says.
4 out of 5 Kids With Fever Improved

The study involved 30 children with autism spectrum disorders, including autism, who were observed by parents during and immediately after experiencing a fever of 100.4 degrees or greater, and seven days after being without fever.

The parents were asked to complete standardized behavior questionnaires during the three time points designed to assess behavior. Parents of children with autism spectrum disorders who did not experience fever were also surveyed at related time points.

More than 80% of the children with fever in the study showed some improvement in behavior during temperature elevations, the researchers reported in the December issue of the journal Pediatrics.

Further analysis showed that behavior improvement was not dependent on the degree of fever.

Zimmerman and lead researcher Laura K. Curran, PhD, tell WebMD that more study is needed to confirm the findings.

"We'd like to interview more families to better understand this," Zimmerman says. "And at the chemical level, we'd like to have blood samples from children while they have fever to analyze what is going on."
Autism, Fever, and Cytokines

One theory is that fever may affect brain function at the cellular level by influencing the production of immune-system signaling proteins known as cytokines.

If this proves to be the case, the finding could result in treatments for autism spectrum disorders that target cytokine expression.

"That would be a long way off, but it is certainly within the realm of possibility," Zimmerman says.

Marguerite Kirst Colston says the new research is significant because it is one of the first to examine the symptoms parents deal with in biological terms.

Colston is a spokeswoman for the American Society of Autism (ASA) and the mother of a 7-year-old son with autism.

"We are hearing more and more about this from parents," she tells WebMD. "Children seem calmer when they are sick and they seem to tolerate closeness and touch better. We have all sort of marveled at this."

Colston hopes the research will lead to more studies that look beyond the genetics of autism.

"The more we study what happens biologically, as well as genetically, the more insight we may have into how to treat children to improve their symptoms," she says. "I would like to see us focus on questions like, 'What helps these kids learn?' and 'What makes them feel better?' 'What do people with autism need to live well?' I'm a parent who has tried a lot of things, and I have no idea."
View Article Sources Sources

SOURCES: Curran, L.K., Pediatrics, December 2007; vol 120: pp 1386-1392. Laura K. Curran, PhD, department of epidemiology, Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health and department of neurology and developmental health, Kennedy Krieger Institute, Baltimore. Andrew W. Zimmerman, MD, pediatric neurologist, Kennedy Krieger Institute, Baltimore. Marguerite Kirst Colston, director of communications, Autism Society of America, Bethesda, Md.
© 2007 WebMD, Inc. All rights reserved.

Worker Bees

I try to not get too specific when I write about work...job specifics...never a good idea when blogging, but what's going on at my job right now is a bit universal to everyone...unfortunately .

There was a meeting at work recently to discuss cares/concerns since the cutbacks/layoffs. Well it was at this meeting that information was given that basically said more layoffs were coming. The scary thing is we're already functioning at a bare bones level as it losing more people is very frightening for all concerned...those staying (whoever they may be) and those leaving (again, whoever they may be). That's the other frustrating one knows who's leaving again *sigh*

Businesses these days are hurting, as is the rest of the country, but I see lots of wasted things being done at these same businesses. Things like purchasing lots of live greenery and plants, instead of artificial, to create an air of holiday spirit. Companies paying for upscale Christmas parties (that only executives and big wigs are invited to as the company party was cancelled long ago due to budgeting reasons)...I think if layoffs are needed to boost the bottomline then some perks like that should be casualties first, and don't even get me started on bonuses for CEO's...actually I think that I will go there...

Eons ago I worked for a large corporation. This company (not the one I work for now) gathered all the employees right before the holidays and basically told the employees that there would either be no raises for anyone the following year or the company would have to cut employees, and as the company could not afford to downsize at that time they were going with the no raises option. Everyone, while not exactly thrilled, was fine with this as everyone was still gamefully employed. Fine, that is, until the 4th quarter statements came out and said that for that particular year...profits were up (albeit minimally so) and the head of the company took a cut in his (or her) bonus that year and instead of the usual $10 to $15 Million bonus...they made due with a paltry $6 Million bonus...our question at the time was if the company was hurting so badly that there would be no raises for the following year for anyone...why not cut the bonuses ?!?!?! (Side note: the year after the no raises, the head of the company received approximately a $20 Million bonus.) It was situations like this that made me start exploring other options in my career and when I left that company they wanted to know what they could do to keep me as I was a valuable asset to the company...go figure.

My point is: it seems to me that the "worker bees" take the brunt of most of the cutbacks while the "queen bees" try to stay in the hive with all the honey. Which IMHO they had more honey from the start. It's not just my industry, but all industries.

The best we "worker bees" can do is expect the worst, hope for the best. I've learned that whatever is going to happen will happen and it's easier to just roll with it than to get stressed out by it (not to mention that it's probably healthier). I have no other advice but that for those of you going through the same thing. So from one "worker bee" to another...hang in there.

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

So here’s to keeping me honest...

Things get busy in my life this time of year. This year is no exception. Everyone has Thanksgiving in November and then there's the frenzy of shopping for Christmas (or Hanukkah or that fictional "Festivus" or what ever you're celebrating this time of year). There's the "Holiday" Parties and then the actual holiday itself. In our house, however, we also have a birthday thrown in (now 2 birthdays, actually, as one of our close friend's children also has a birthday in December.) AND this sister's getting married! Don't get me wrong...I'm thrilled for her...absolutely...I'm just being pulled a gazillion directions.

Now that I've said all of that...I want to say this: Knowing that all of this was coming about...I decided that it would be a FABULOUS idea to start a weight loss program back in October. Not for vanity, but for health...ok and maybe a little vanity . Well my goal for the holidays was to just far so good. I've actually lost 23 lbs since early October 8, 2007 (5 since Thanksgiving if you can believe that!) I have A LOT more to go, but I am staying positive and now I'm trying to keep myself honest. For those who knew me "way back when" this will be a shocker...I topped out at *deep breath* 264.4lbs. while I'm still big...I am, as I said earlier, down 23lbs. so here's to keeping me honest.

I'll keep you all posted...on all of the above

I love this quote (Originally posted on Wednesday, October 10, 2007)

"I know of nobody who is purely Autistic or purely neurotypical. Even God had some Autistic moments, which is why the planets all spin." ~ Jerry Newport

You may have heard this before but I liked it, and I hope you do too.

I had never heard of Jerry before I found this quote at this website:

and then, after googling him, I found his website:

He and his wife seem really awesome. I think I'll be looking for the movie "Mozart and the Whale" or the book by the same name sometime soon! Just thought I'd share..

"WEAK-MINDED"?!?!?!?! or Why I am the way I am. (Originally posted onFriday, September 14, 2007)

I reposted a bulletin on MySpace entitled "My Best Friend", and the response I've gotten in some ways has just shocked me...some people just reposted it...others didn't...others responded to me personally with their thoughts and still others questioned me and my "weak-mindedness". It is the latter of that list that shocks me.

Anyone who knows me personally, knows that I am a Christian, but they also know (or at least I hope that they know) that I am not judgemental of them. I always try to see things from another person's point of view, AND above all I always at least try to be kind and considerate to others.

That being said, the reason I am shocked is that I simply put out there what I believe and am thought to be "weak-minded"??? I was raised in a Christian home and I am a preacher's kid. It was in that home that I was taught to do unto others as I would have them do unto me. It was also in that home that I was taught that no one is perfect and everyone deserves a second chance. I was also taught to try to live a "Christ-like" life, which I don't even claim to have come close to doing, but I do think I've done well in the being kind, giving and considerate to others department. I have friends of so many different faiths (Jewish, Christian, Muslim, Hindu,Wiccan,Taoist) and I work in an environment where people are not easily offended, because they cannot afford to be, and do their jobs properly...if the tone of the post "My Best Friend" came across as preachy, then it is for THAT...that I am sorry. I am NOT, however, sorry for the content.

If I were to go off the handle at someone for saying to me "Blessed Be" or writing encouraging words to me such as "Compromise to please others is not as good as integrity that annoys others. Rather than be praised without being good, it is better to be slandered without being bad. " (a Taoist teaching) Where would my "Christ-likeness" be in that? Instead I just take the encouraging words for what they are...encouragement.

My friends and I have been known to get into discussions about faith where we ultimately decide that we need to "agree to disagree". Now are they "weak-minded" for not further sharing their beliefs...or am I for NOT becoming the stereotypical, tyrannical, fanatical Christian that people fear, but instead remaining the caring Christian person I profess to be?

OK, I'm getting preachy again so I'll back off..

Basically, I'm a preacher's kid who later became a chaplain's kid and then later as an adult had some life experiences that shook me to my core and made me STRONGLY QUESTION my own beliefs...(for more on those just ask...that's another story all in and of itself). The only things that got me through were my faith, my family, and my friends. If what I believe and how I believe it makes me "weak-minded" then so be it! Maybe the world would be a better place if we all were so "weak-minded" that we "agreed to disagree" when necessary...and took the passing on of others thoughts and beliefs as simply them exercising their 1st Ammendment Rights...but there I go getting on my soap-box again...

If you’re a mom or if you know a mom you’ll appreciate this! (Orignially posted on Tuesday, September 11, 2007)

One of my friends has this video on her profile on Myspace and I watched it and it is the FUNNIEST thing (even if it is true!) that I've seen in a while! I found it soooo funny, in fact, that I had to add it to my profile, but I also wanted to comment on it too.

Total Momsense Clip

Add to My Profile | More Videos

I've caught myself saying a few of those things...more than once actually...and SWORE that it was my own mom possessing my body long enough to say the things that I SWORE SIX WAYS TO SUNDAY I would NEVER SAY to my own children...such as "Because I said so." and "You don't need to know the reason why." Unfortunately, those are sometimes, not always, but sometimes the best answers to the myriad of questions coming out of children who are only testing there boundries. Ahhh, parenthood...the great equalizer (well at least one of them).

And I go on laughing...

So long, and thanks for all the fish! (Originally posted on Tuesday, August 28, 2007)

That's what I feel like here lately...just like the dolphins in "The Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy".

With everything going on at work right now I feel like that's what we have to do to move on to the next level. It's horrible really...I wasn't laid off, but those that were it's like "Hey we'll miss you and the nice things you do, but we no longer have a use for you as the world is changing and you're not part of it from now on." Even those of us staying are adjusting to this new it through schedule changes...job realignment...everyone learning what they can to "survive" and be "useful".

Can I turn into a dolphin and just swim off? OR Maybe start a "Save the Humans" campaign so things like this don't just happen? OK...maybe I just need more sleep?

It's not just worklife that changes on a's son is just thriving and excelling at daugheter isn't a baby anymore she's doing all sorts of new things everyday, but she LOVES gymnastics, and she's GOOD at it! How long will it be they tell me and their dad "So long, and thanks for all the fish"? I realize it won't be soon, but it'll probably be sooner than WE'D like.

I don't know why I think about all this so much...maybe because I'm overwhelmed sometimes....maybe it's because my birthday's around the corner and I miss being a kid getting all excited about having one. Don't get me wrong, I'm thrilled that another birthday's someone wise once told me, "It beats the alternative!" There is so much more I want to do that's for sure!

Maybe we'll win the lottery and I'll quit my job and open a children's theatre...that would be FANTASTIC (Maybe not wise from a financial sense, but FANTASTIC nonetheless!)

Thanks for listening to my ramblings...and this one has just concluded
Love to all!

Sometimes.... (Originally posted onSunday, August 19, 2007)

"...a cigar is just a cigar." I think Freud said that, but at this hour of the morning I'm not really sure. Sometimes...there is never enough sleep. I definately said that.

OK, this is probably not going to make any sense what so ever...I should be soooo well rested...but no...I can't seem to get a decent night's sleep to save my life! Maybe it's stress...maybe I need a vacation...maybe...oh forget it!

I'm not upset...just is it possible to go to bed and to sleep a decent 8 hours (when you're use to 6 or less) for SEVERAL DAYS, and be MORE EXHAUSTED than I was at the beginning of last week? That's all I'm saying.

Change of subject...the kids started gymnastics son did well in his class (we're working on increasing his upper body strength) daughter was almost a natural in her class...she just took to it and she's sooooo strong for her age. I'm proud of them both.

Change of subject has become a stress factory again...they are trying to automate, but surprise surprise...not everything talks to a computer...namely our graphics system, but corporate in its infinite wisdom says move ahead with HD (which has not had too many hold ups) and then go ahead with automation (which has had quite a few) ASAP regardless of if we still have to operate graphics manually at that point...While this doesn't cause me any problems in whether or not I keep my job...others who have been told they will be gone may not be gone at least not anytime soon. Why am I going on about this? I don't know I just feel like rambling.

Change of subject starts son's excited, but not all at the same time.

Change of subject 4...I'm incredibly out of inlaws bought me an early birthday present...a husband and I and the kids have played for at least a couple of hours every night since we brought it home and there's a lot of soreness going on in my body. Places that didn't even hurt after giving birth to either one of my children hurt've gotten my butt kicked by a video was tennis doubles, followed by baseball, followed by bowling, and a little bit of boxing...I so need to get back to the gym.

That's my life up to this point...I'll ramble more later.

What Not To Wear? This T-Shirt (Originally posted on Friday, August 03, 2007)

I saw this on the web and I just found it too funny to not put it in my blog...some people's kids! She's just lucky she didn't kill anyone!

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Amanda Lynn Bailey.

The Associated Press

Published: August 3, 2007

TAMPA -- Amanda Lynn Bailey's T-shirt said it all.

When the 41-year-old got picked up on DUI charges she was wearing a shirt that read: "I'm not an alcoholic, I'm a drunk. Alcoholics go to meetings." The T-shirt was captured in her mug

The Riverview woman was arrested Tuesday and charged with driving under the influence and driving with a canceled, suspended or revoked license.

She also was arrested in April on DUI charges. Police did not capture any T-shirt messages in that mug shot.

I would rather be home! (Originally posted on Wednesday, August 01, 2007)

I'm just cranky sorry...

I just wanted to vent and get it out of my system.

Long story short, I'm working a 14 hour day. I came to work today expecting a normal 8 hour day, but due to others calling in sick (legitamently) and others being on vacation (God knows, legitamently) my boss had no choice but to have me to stay until midnight, as another coworker came in at 4am and will have to be back at 4am for the rest of the week due to the same above reasons. I can handle long days when I know about them ahead of time, but to be sucker punched with it is another story. Now, I'm not saying that my boss was out to get me...he didn't really have any other choice...I'm just saying that the situation is frustrating.

This isn't poetic, this isn't philosophical, it just is.

The strange thing being me...I feel AWFUL about being irritated about having to stay late, when things could easily be soooooo much worse. I, of all people, know that this ISN'T a big deal, so why get bent out of shape about it??? If you can figure that out for me then you will have figured out one of my (I only have one...really????) biggest neuroses...guilt over nothing!

Guilt over something is one thing is one thing (you commit some own up to it...some sort of resolution takes place), but guilt over nothing is just plan idiotic! You can't fix it, because...let's face it...there's nothing to fix! But I digress...

ANYWAY I'm working late.
It really stinks.
I'd rather be home,
but that's
Not happening TONIGHT!

Thus my vent ends...thanks for listening.

Kirk Douglas Interview (Originally posted on Wednesday, July 25, 2007)

Today, or rather yesterday we had an interview with Kirk Douglas on Daytime. He was promoting his new book "Let's Face It".

It was a satellite interview, so no, I didn't get to personally meet the man, but it was just interesting to watch this interview being taped. He was interviewed by Lindsay MacDonald and she has interviewed people many times (satellite or not), but usually the interviews are very informal, call the celebrities by their first names (ie Bruce Willis would be simply Bruce); however, this man is a cenimatic legend and Lindsay, for obvious reasons, was referring to him as "Mr. Douglas".

Anyway, I swear I have a point, those of us in the control room were going on about how as a younger man he was incredibly dashing and handsome

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and now he's just a sweet "old man"

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Be that as it may, he was extremely charming to Lindsay, and the interview seemed more like a conversation than an interview in my opinion. Despite his stroke and slower speech, his sense of timing is still there...he set up a joke and none of us knew it was a joke until the punchline hit, and we were all laughing. At one point, I think he had our producer crying, because she found him "...just so lovable".

He just seemed to love doing what he does, and that came across. The fact that he came across so friendly and down to earth and happy to be there (and believe me we've done interviews where celebrities were in the mind set of let's just get this over with!) just made my day. It also made me think that there's so much more to life than the daily grind, and I should try my best to be happy in the moment I'm in and not worry so much about all the other stuff.

I'm going to bed now, and that's my ramble for the day

Ok, so I went to this birthday party with my son... (Orignally posted on Sunday, July 15, 2007)

Ok, so I went to this birthday party with my son, yesterday, and let me first say that I didn't expect that little kids loved him sooooo much. My son goes to a Montessori School that is PreK3 - 8th grade. Next year he'll be in 1st grade in the K & 1st grade class, where he'll be the "mentor" to the K's in his class. ANYWAY, we got to the firestation(it's older and has been converted to a teaching center for little kids) and I begin to realize the my son is the oldest child there, but the 3, 4 and the few 5 year olds were all excited that he came. "(He)'s here! (he)'s here!" The birthday boy ran over and told my son,"I'm sooooo glad you came to my party."

The noise was a bit much for my son, at first, he covered his ears and did some minor "stimming" by shaking and wringing his hands (but nothing major and all a part of his Asperger's), but after 1 or 2 minutes this all stopped and he adjusted nicely (He's adjusting much quicker these days to unfamiliar situations). He was bored as first (all of the activities were geared toward 3 and 4 year olds), but when the fire truck got there he was ecstatic! He got to see a fireman in his full gear ("Mom he sounds like Darth Vadar with that mask on!"). Got to climb on the truck, see all the hoses, axes, airtanks, etc., AND because he was there and NOT scared of the fireman the younger kids would go up and meet the fireman in his gear.

It went something like this:

Mom/Dad, " Johnny/Susie you can go shake hands with the fireman"

Johnny/Susie, "No, he's scary looking"

Mom/Dad, "He's just in his work clothes...there's nothing to be scared of."

Johnny/Susie, "No!"

Meanwhile my son's already walked up, said hi, shaken hands, and given high 5's. He then says (and I'm not kidding), "Guys...they're cool! It's ok."

Massive flood of little kids onto the poor fireman, "(He)said they're ok Mom/Dad."

And the same thing happened with "Sparky the Fire Dog" (Think "McGruff the Crime Dog" and make him a dalmation)

The birthday boy's mom told me before we left that she worried that my son would be bored, because it was geared more towards the little kids, but the birthday boy had insisted saying that my son doesn't treat them like babies, and he HAD to be there. She also said that she was glad he came, because he got the others to not be soooo scared of the Fireman and "Sparky".

Anyway, I was proud of my little man and thought I'd share.

Life is looking up! (Originally posted on Friday, June 29, 2007)

I seem to only write when I'm down (with one or two exceptions of course)...and I, for one, am tired of that and (for now at least) I say enough!!!

Today, I am thankful and greatful and hopeful and just happy in general and I thought I'd share.

My morning started off with my youngest giving me kisses before she left with her dad for daycare...then she waved and said "bye-bye mommy" in that way that way only a almost 2 year old can. You see, when she wakes up early enough for her dad to take her it puts her in the BEST MOOD, but she still won't leave with him for daycare until she says good morning and bye to me as well. Well, after saying good-bye to the dynamic duo, I get myself up and start getting ready for work. My oldest is still asleep, so I have a little bit of time to myself in the quiet of the morning, which keeps me sane. After I finish getting dressed, I go to wake up my son, who is ready, and I do mean ready, for his summer camp activity today as all Fridays, regardless of the week's theme, is WATER DAY!!! He double checks..."Mom is it water day it Friday?" "Yes" Gleeful maddness insues as he quickly gets everything packed up for the day.

I finish getting ready and go to get him breakfast, and unbeknowst to me he's fixed himself breakfast! AND he didn't make a mess!!! Wow! When did he get soooooo big??? We both finish up getting ready and we're off.

Drop him off at camp...I'm off to work and low and behold a 1st floor parking spot! Now I'm scheduled for well after most normal business hours begin so this never happens, and is a much welcomed surprise.

Work is work, but after much stress the past few months...I survived the job cuts , my mother-in-law is on new chemo and it isn't nearly as harsh on her system as the other she's much stronger and healthier, my sister is slowly feeling better so I worry about her a little less and my husband just sent me an email for no reason other than to check up on me.

Let's see, other reasons I'm happy, it's FINALLY going to rain here, it's almost the weekend, my vacation starts really soon, and my youngest is about to turn 2 very soon!

Could things be better??? Of course they could, but are they bad???? HECK NO! And dadgummit I choose to be happy!

I miss my friend... (Originally posted on Thursday, June 28, 2007)

A lot has happened this week and I just keep thinking about my friend, Danielle.

My sister just lost a friend in a plane crash earlier this week and she's having a hard time dealing with it, and while one person can never fully understand what another person is going through...I know that one feeling of "Why????" all too well.

On July 7th, 6 years will have passed since my friend was killed in her own home by a complete stranger. On July 6th, 6 years will have passed since I last saw her, and while I don't think about how she died too much any more, and usually don't think about the date of her death almost all came rushing back at me earlier this week when my sister just said one simple thing...."Why?"

I didn't know how to answer her. I didn't want to tell her that she'll most likely never get an answer. I also didn't want to tell her that the "why?" question will sometimes come and bite you in the butt when you least expect it.

I'm not a doom and gloom person, but it has been my experience in the past 6 years that sometimes, for no reason at all, you just miss your friend or think about them a lot. Some are obvious like the birth of my daughter two years ago...Danielle had been alive for the birth of my son and in the 7 months that she was around him she spoiled him rotten! She couldn't do that for my little girl and it was a little hard to take at the time. Although, for some reason I still got the sense that she was there anyway. Some times are not so obvious like just making hotdogs for the kids and remembering that that's what you had for dinner the last time you saw her.

I just miss the little things friends do together...talking, shopping, going to the movies...mostly I just miss my friend.

My sister will eventually be fine. It takes a while, but like I said I usually don't even think about how or when Danielle died. I remember her birthday every year...Jan. 30th...and the things we did together and the fun we had. My sister will eventually get passed this and she'll go on. You never forget them. They are with you always, but still...I miss my friend.

So here I am at O'dark thirty (Originally posted on Wednesday, June 20, 2007)

I can't sleep... I don't know why...

I survived the cutbacks at the kids to bed early...have a fairly easy day ahead of me...shared a FABULOUS bottle of wine with my husband tonight...and actually got to have a REAL conversation with him about anything, and everything.

Since I can't sleep, my mind begins to mull over things, and it hits me that even after being married to this man for over 11 years, he's still my best friend and I love him.

Ok, now for all of you who don't want to read this because it's sappy drivel...that's fine, but I feel incredibly blessed and lucky that I finally got my act together and gave him a shot and actually dated him nearly 14 years ago. For those who don't know...I met my husband (not dated him, but met him) in the second half of 9th grade. For all those doing the math...2007 - 1987 = 20 years ago ( I feel old) so I met him when I was 14 almost 15.

We became friends and for some reason, best friends to the point the we even said back then, that who ever we ended up with was going to have to put up with this other person (wasn't that a stupid thing to about dooming a relationship). It took us 6 years to come to the conclusion that we should be together, and I'm glad we did!

I'm not writing this to say,"Oh look at me and my WONDERFUL life"...I'm writing it because I just want to send it out there to the ether that he is a very good man who still loves me after everything over the years both good & bad: 2 kids, premotions, 2001 my own personal "hell year" - my grandmothers death, followed by the murder of a close friend followed by 9/11...let's just say I went a little nuts that year, a gain of several pounds, a loss of many pounds followed of course by a gain of many more pounds, me working a job that...if there's a hurricane spinning in the Gulf...I might not be home for 2 or 3 days and he's stuck with both kids (they're great, but that's not an easy task), silly things like picnics in the living room (both with and without the kids), talks on the porch, and all the craziness that is

So, I can't sleep and...all I am at the moment, besides tired of course, is grateful...that for whatever reason...I am here in this moment and I am truly happy.

Stress & Hope (Originally posted on Friday, June 15, 2007)

I don't know what's going on with my job right now.... They are going to be laying off people, but due to technical issues no one knows when that's going to happen exactly or which people are getting laid off, but supposedly on Monday we will be told our to the latter. Due to my experience (I'm desperately trying not to sound egomaniacal) I should be fine, BUT you just never know in these things.

If I'm let got though, I'm not as stressed as you would think I should be...
Don't get me wrong, I'd like to keep my job, but if I don't that'll be the kick in the pants I need for a career change that I've been putting off for too long now. TV news just starts to wear on you after a while, and I long for a "normal" (whatever that is) life for a change. I've already submitted my application to Hillsborough for transitioning to teaching...I just need to take some tests so that I qualify to teach more than just Speech and Drama. I know after 12 years, you'd think I'd qualify to teach TV Production, but there is a test I must take before I can teach that.

Here's hoping all goes well. Will let you know more on Monday.

Just some random thoughts... (Originally posted on Tuesday, June 12, 2007)

I'm sitting here doing what my day mostly consists of these days....Hurry up and wait...hurry up and wait, and it hits me that I'm busier when I'm home with the kids and family than I am when I'm working. Don't get me job can get INCREDIBLY HECTIC at times, but for the most part it's a "you need to be where we can find you in case something happens" sort of thing.

Anyway, while I'm sitting here I realize that when I'm waiting I just think random odd things like...

Why is it that when we agree that I haven't had a lot of sleep due to one or both of the kids being sick and getting up with them, my hubby will do the honors on this particular night...that everyone sleeps right through? AND after a few days of this, meaning everyone getting a good nights rest, I say something magical like,"If anyone wakes up (with a nightmare, sick, etc.) I'll get them" and the universe hears the "I'll get them" part and it's up all night for me again?

Why is it when your in a hurry, people on the road took their "stupid-pills" that day, but when you don't need to be anywhere...there's nothing in your way?

Is this all just Murphy's Law or do I need an attitude adjustment?

I'm normally a very happy person, but I just can't seem to get out of this funk here lately.

Do I want to cook tonight...or order take out?

Where did I put that hairclip again?

I looked like a complete idiot playing dance party with my kids last night, but I haven't had that much fun since I can't remember when.

When I get my I want to do anything different with it?

Am I boring the person who decided to read this blog entry? If I I care...a little yeah.

Maybe I should dye my hair red again...maybe not

Who'd ever have thought that I'd like to be a long will the transition from TV take?

What am I going to do for lil bit's birthday? Wow how did she grow up so fast?

Speaking of growing up...big stuff's a little man now...lost his first tooth and everything.

Did I start the dishwasher before I left home this morning?

Really random stuff, but that's what I get for sitting on my bum most days.

Family (Originally posted on Monday, June 04, 2007)

My husband just called me and his mom is being admitted into the hospital. She's been going through Chemo for the past 6 weeks and usually she just has a few bad days, but this time it's been worse and her doctor's are admitting her.

We don't know anything yet...but my husband is obviously worried about his mom and his dad, and is on his way to the hospital to see how she's doing and to go help his dad out....

Just stressed a little at the moment.

Why do people not think??? (Originally posted Saturday, June 02, 2007)

I swear some days people DRIVE ME NUTS!!! Let's automate EVERYTHING, because it's better???? Oh really? We're in the middle of a tropical storm right now in Florida, and central control somewhere in OHIO can't seem to get anything right...putting commercials smack in the middle of the Today Show...not giving us control when we need to get on the air with a Tornado watch/warning...but this is better...yeah right. I totally agree *dripping with sarcasm* What were they thinking?!?!? Oh'll save money...never mind we are putting excrement on the air!

Then there's the people who are paniced because of a Tropical Storm...this one is EXTREMELY MILD...hardly any wind and mostly light rain, but you'd think driving into work this morning that we were in a Tsunami or Monsoon or something...I barely had my windsheild wipers on for crying out loud!

Sorry about the's just the end of a very long week and I'd rather be anywhere other than work on a Saturday morning (especially since it's my normal day off...but oh well). At least it's for a good reason...The All Children's Hospital Telethon that starts tonight. I'm covering for people who are working out there...the kids out there are soooo precious and now I'm irritated at myself for feeling sorry for myself, cause those kids have it so much worse.

See I'm one of those people who don't think too! Now I feel better.

My 20 Minute Survey (Originally Posted Wednesday, May 30, 2007

The longest survey you'll ever fill out! Do the world a favor: fill it out and post it for all your friends. Do this because the person who sent it to you didn't sit here for ages for nothing. Answer all the questions honestly, no lying to avoid stuff.

Starting Time:2:05 p.m.

Name: Grace
Sisters: 1
Brothers: 1

Eye Color: blue
Shoe size: 7 and 1/2

Height: 5'3"

what are you wearing right now: Lt. Blue Tee shirt and jeans
where do i live: Tampa

Favorite Number: 3 (it's a magic number)
Favorite Drink: Milo's Sweet Tea (and boy do I miss it!)
Favorite Month: July
Favorite Breakfast: Eggs overeasy and corn beef hash and grits

***********Have You Ever*****************

Loved someone so much it made you cry: yes

Broken a bone: no

Been in a police car: yes

Been on a plane:yes

Came close to dying: no

Been in a hot tub: yes

Swam in the ocean: yes

Fallen asleep in school: yes

Broken someone's heart: yes

Fell off your chair: omg...yes

Sat by the phone all night waiting for someone to call: yes

Saved e-mails: yes

Been cheated on: yes

***********What is-****************

Your room like: beige with mission style furniture mostly in cherry wood and cluttered

Right beside you: several tv monitors

What is the last thing you ate: Sausage, Egg & Cheese Crossaint

------------Ever Had- -------------------------------

Chicken pox: no

Sore throat: yes

Stitches: yes

Broken nose: no

Believe in love at first sight: no

Like picnics: yes

Like school: yes, I'm a nerd, I know


What makes you smile: my kids laughter


Did you last yell at: some crazy driver on 275

Do you like filling these out: when I'm lazy or bored YES!
Do you wear contact lenses or glasses: both (but not at the same time of course)

Do you like yourself: mostly

---------------------Final Questions---------------------------

What are you listening to right now: quiet

What did you do today: went to work, but it's been REAL SLOW today

What car do you wish to have: oh this one's easy...a 1968 red mustang convertible

Good singer: yes

Diamond or pearl: diamond

Are you the oldest: yes

Indoors or outdoors: both

------------------------Today did you------------------------------

Talk to someone you like: yes...lots of people actually.

Get sick: no

Sing: no

Talked to an ex: Ironically enough yes.

Miss someone: yes

--------------------Last who---------------------------

Was in your bed: My hubby

You talked to on the phone: My mom

Made you cry: John Winter R.I.P.
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Went to the movies with: "Nivabeth"

You went to the mall with: hubby and kiddos and in laws

Been to Mexico: no

Been to Canada: no

Been to Africa: no


Do you have a crush on someone: hubby

What books are you reading right now: right now none

Best feeling in the world: when the kids are asleep sitting on my back porch talking with friends about nothing and everything and knowing for just that moment everyone is safe and content.

Future kids names: don't plan on any more

Do you sleep with a stuffed animal: it depends...did I fall asleep in one of the kids rooms again?

What's under your bed: gift wrap and gift bags and a louisville slugger

Favorite sport to watch: Gymnastics

Favorite location: the mountains

Who do you really hate: no one

Do you have a job: yes

Ever liked someone you didn't have a chance with: of course

are you lonely right now: no


With however long it took you to complete this, post as
"my __ minute survey

What Color Purple are you? (Originally posted on Wednesday, May 30, 2007)



You Are Iris

You are an interesting blend of fun and wisdom.

You definitely make people think about themselves and their place in the world.

But they'll have fun doing it. You definitely epitomize laughter therapy.

You are a very enriching and entertaining friend!

Thanks Clare! This was fun and a test to see what exactly I could do on this blog thing.